At a loss Here.

  I am at a loss on how these People are allowed to ruin My Life and then screw with Me. Good God!

Riverton Wyoming and getting cooler.

   The Mountains close by, the Wind Rivers, was gifted with enough snow last night to tell Us winter is creepin' in. You want some rugged country? The majority of these areas are Wilderness areas. Grizzlies and Wolves. Most of You out there look at Them as Animals, well They are. And They do as Animals do, They get hungry and eat something. The Wolves in particular have increased since the introduction of the Canadian species, bigger and faster, thus becoming a danger. Don't tell Me They won't attack Humans either. In the Cody Wyoming paper about a year or so ago there was an article about a Gentleman being chased while riding His bike. They never mentioned if He was on a Mountain trail or not but hey, a Wolf after You for dinner? I did'nt plan on going off on this subject Tonight really, I wanted to talk about how this Richard Pattison and His Pals were as Children. Nerds? Yea that is what Richard ran with. I know 'em all too well. I did'nt hang out with these Boy's Myself I became a Friend through Bill Rowley after working with Him. I just found a good finish for Tonite, Wolves in Nerds clothing. "Revenge of the Nerds!", is something Richard would come up with I can bet money. M t.v.? I do remember seeing Mike Judge's comic strip when He lived at Reagon Hills apartments. He used to sell pot that's how I wound up at His apartment. I wonder how deep Richard is. It is peculiar when I see all the commercials with a guitar in them. Being a Musician I notice this more. You have to understand Richard here, the Kid's baddass. I'd love to drop Him, and continue to kick Him in vital spots along His torso, but the Boy can play the guitar. This in no way excuses His actions then and now. "A Hot Dog.", "Too Cool.", "Hot Shot Kid.", "Too Smooth.", "Spoiled.",I can go on and on with cliche's about those Children. This Child needs You to know and see that I am here and I am in a certain sense My right mind. That in itself scares Me. I am writing this and seeing it in front of Me. I do take a realistic look at Myself, especially when I am writing this junk. As I have said since day one, this is no gag, Kelly.

Again I type, why?

   The question is why, why live? Why help Others? Why should We worry about the World's problems? Why am I asking? Because! People of Today's World are more intelligent They say. I don't feel it is so. Yes We have advanced beyond any of Their expectations for a fact, but all We are now are well educated. Even Myself had fair grades in My last four years of School. In fact due to probation I had to aquire My records. I had a B average in everything except Science where I had a D average. Of those classes range from creative writing, math, P.E., welding, food service, building trades, auto body, and the regular crowd. I came out with a B that makes Me feel good. Of course I never venture into Algebra, but I can spell it. Nor did I achieve a passing grade in Physics or Trig either. My plan was to skate through as close as I could without to much trouble, and yes that is how My life has actually been too. The wrong hand leading a Child does have severe affects People. I don't care much for bragging, what I say right here and now may sound like it though, if People would have left the little Boy alone He would have found greatness instead of being the one that saw it pass in front of Him without an ability to grab it. Life sucks for a lot of Us, Hey We don't need Your help in that area. "Hold Him back He's a Dummy.", that would tear a Childs heart out admit it. If You think a retarded Person has no clue that They are actually slow You are naive. Man, I am blown away. I also had an I,Q, # on that School report.................one hundred and sixty four if I remember right. I am not far off for damn sure. I even took one of those computer test recently, 125 but it was confusing at first on how to take the test. I did what I could in Their time limit. So I aint the biggest Dummy on Earth am I?

In the first place if I were,,,,,

   When My mind holds still long enough to really grasp how Others are it is amazing how Children are in America Today. A frightening thing is taking place and yet They screw with Me? I insist on the fact that I do write this crap from the heart too. I have an idea to help You with Your decision about Me, am I the one making fun of some retarded Kid? My Grand Mothers name is Ella, I am Grandpa Kelly too. Proof being on the text messages months before the show from area code 512, number 300-9450. A throw away phone from Target I still pay $10. a year on to keep active. It is in fact within ear shot as I type and For hours after to boot.  Damn it! I thought They were My Friends Folks. I have said it before and I am saying it again, if nothing else comes out of this other then changing Lives, opening eyes, Hell I'd be proud for damn sure. Hey! What the Fuck? Kelly.

By Golly!

   What in the Hell is a Golly? And to be by Golly? Is that like Holy Smokes, or By Jsesus? One thing I have taken into view, which does mean "I have noticed." is that when something is cool, meaning acceptable, We tend to copy it. Fact. Even saying the word fact is the same damn thing. Hey, do you want to go way overboard with that one? From the Day You are taught to talk You are in actuality just mocking what You see and hear. From that Day forward You instinctively watch and accept what is being formed. My experience in this field is undocumented yes. But My experience up close and for real is exactly that. I have heard over the years sayings such as "In the real World", I have one thing to say there. I may not live in Your World, but what ever World was created for Me is as real as it can be fro Me. I do not think of this as a fun thing what I am doing here. I have cried My eyes out Folks just to get this out there. Hey, I am a small Child in the eyes of Grown. I Myself would have killed this Child years ago if I thought He were unworthy of a decent Life. Kelly McGill.

F-in' Heimer!

   I left a little memento on My way from L.A. to Sacramento. The whole way up 99 I wrote F-in ' Heimer was Here! It was a monotony breaker. I wrote I slept here, I bathed here and a few other choice sayings I can't really recall. The point is, I did it. Kelly McGill has gone so many places and seen so many different opportunities in His Life and that is a written fact right here and now. But why in the Hell can He not be a normal Lover? Huh! Again, I am a lost Fool with a rough way in Life. This in itself will tarnish a Persons pride. I have said before that when I was blindsided by Nancy I looked so deep into the depths of My Life and knew I was out classed. The pain from that I would only wish on a rotten Human. Pain in Life opens Our eyes to reality. He that wishes to argue go hit Yourself with a hammer. By golly I'll show Ya sooner or later that I am a decent Human being harrassed in a fashion unallowed. By golly I let stand since I wrote 'er that way. Kelly.

You are a reason to live.

   Yes, I have a wisdom that allows Me to look at the World. I admit that My mental eye has yet to develope fully. I see Grown People new everytime I see one that's how new I am. A Greenhorn for sure. But the difference is that I do have an open mind to growing. I feel feelings most of You out there, no exaggerations, may never feel. People die daily You know? I could be done right after, or during this next sentence. Wow! I know for sure Nobodies wrote that one down before. But hey, My name is Kelly McGill and I was left to hang. I had to grab the attention of some People with the position to act upon what is a horrible offence. I truly am amazed at how these People are allowed to do what it is that They actually do get away with. Reality! You as a whole feel it is a cordial gathering. You against the slow Guy. I am that slow Guy. I hurt Nancy, and that one devastates Me. Reality? Grow the fuck up! What You have here is a lost soul that understands exactly where He is and What exactly is going on in the World around Him. I am not a totally lost Child, even though I Myself have My doubts without a joke intended. Hey! I am the one They..... Oh? You don't really give a Fuck? Wow? Americans Today? "Who cares?", "Dumbass!", "What a Winner!" or whatever clever things You have to say. Hey!!!! You!!!! The one joking about Me or anything else that a Man refuses to laugh at!!!!!!!!!