still tryin'

  Well? How on Earth does a Guy bring down the Giants? If it were You as I continually say You'd want justice as well. I guess this is all for not. So I'll go out with class and just say a few things that may just enlighten a few Folks Today. "Needs a Kid.", "Boy's want.", "I'm not a naughty Boy.", "Kiddie shit.", "A wet behind the ears Girl.", "That Man's a Kid.", "That Man's just a Kid.", "That old Gentleman grew.", "The first thing You do is admit to it.", "Men will make You mature.", "You're too young to be called a Man.", and My favorite, one a Gal said in Elko Nevada once, "I am a Lady! I am a Fucking Lady!", some People lie to Themselves all the time. Have a good one, Kelly.

Terrible here

   You really want to here how bad it is? I can actually count how many Lovers I had and it is absurd. For a fact there have been around twenty, no shit. I was'nt really doing all that bad, for Me, in the early eighties, but I went screwy a little after the reality of what happened between Nancy and Myself hit Me. "Stubborn Human pride.", is a main factor. There are times when I just tell Myself that I've been alone at night before, another lonely night won't hurt, lying to Myself I know. I take a good hard look at Myself when I tell You this about My life believe Me. I for one have made a lot of mistakes in My life and I am sure as Hell paying for them. The saddest thing about this whole mess is that I should'nt be alone, that's fucked up. Ya know? I was a bitter Son of a Bitch before I realized what Richard Pattison and Bill Rowley did to My sorry existance, but now I am really hate what is known as My life. I sure as Hell hope this crap is worth it. You Folks enjoy Your weekend, Kelly.

Happy Holidays to You

   I hope the old fat Man brought You what You wanted, or at least You are sitting with loved ones Today. I have something to say about My old Friends. If They were in fact Friends I too would be living the rich life. If a Friend of Mine was set up in such a manner I would most definitely tell Them. I would not set this Person up with enough acid to mess up Their mind and then hand Them this Playboy, and if it told You something and I Myself had read it I would say something to You about it. I would not try to make You mad enough to fight and then take it and make My own life wealthy and say fuck that Guy. Why? Because normal Men and Women don't do such things. And Yes, I can call Myself normal in some aspects of normality. I am not Gay, a Child molester, a Rapist nor a Murderer. Being Love struck is more normal then You may think. I have heard it said before where that when Somebody loses a true love They don't really want Anybody else, foolish yes, but You only have eyes for Her. "It's enough to drive a Man insane.", or "It sours some People.", might make some sense to You, it means something to Me. "Loneliness will drive You insane.", but I have a strong mind, if not I would have totally lost it years ago. Have a great life folks, Kelly.

I'm back

  I have'nt been here for a few days, it sure is nice to be back to work. I do believe this is one of the best Crews I have been on too. It's all new to Me out there, I have done metal studs before but never built a whole house out of them. I have been saying for years that the new wave of construction is going to be metal and concrete. It makes sense the way They say We're tearing down the forests faster than they can regrow. It sure is a lot slower too, it took six Journeymen eight hours to build three walls, I'd fire the whole crew if it were wood. With that said I will leave You by saying Merry Christmas. I hope You enjoy You're day and receive great things. Kelly.

7000 page veiws

   18 away from 7000, Dang! I have a couple words for You here, "Justifiable homicide.", and that is how I feel about this Bill Rowley and Richard Pattison. I know Myself pretty well and know it would be easy for Me to do so after what They have done to My life too. I have to say though that I will not go out of My way to do anything, even though I went to Santa Monica to take Richard if I found Him. Speaking of that, I knew I would'nt find Him. In the first place the odds of running into Him in the L.A. area walking the streets are pretty high. You People need to understand something here, They did screw with My life and They still are Today. I know for a fact that They set it up so I'd do the acid and listen to the music. L.S.D. is a mind altering drug, and that is exactly what Their plot was, to alter My thinking. I cannot say enough how angry this in itself makes Me, and now They are messing with Me on T.V.? Goddam it Man!!! That is fucked up, Kelly.

It's a cruel World

   You know? My life has sucked, seriously. I really don't go around bitching about it to People, except here, because Nobody wants to hear it. But I am at this point in My life that I want to do something about it. I have a plan, and if it goes right I should be able to retire with a decent life. It is something to reach the age of fifty three and see how fast life passes by. I have worked as a Carpenter since '80 and have put nothing away. I have no retirement set up. And I ache all over these days. I really don't care to continue to bust My ass until I am in My sixties, but I know I could if I had to. I am in pretty good shape even though I need to lose around sixty pounds, I walk every night and carpentry is'nt an easy living. I am confident that what I am working on is going to take My life in another direction, I just have to make it work for Me. I really do wish these Bastards had left Me alone in My life. If I had the brain I once had I would have had a better life I know this for sure. I would not be known as a spaced out Kid for one thing. But I understand that it is something that I have to live with. At least I aint smokin' any of that pot crap, that really made Me bad off. One reason I stopped is because it made Me feel like a Kid, really. That's a matter of pride, I might not have much but I do have some. I keep telling Myself that if Nancy was here My pride would be intact and People would be surprised at the Man standing beside Her. As I have said before, I do know the difference between a young Man and a Full Grown Adult. I leave You with this said. I will be back, Kelly.

This done got old

   Yea that's for damn sure, this stuff was old two years ago, but what else can I do? I want these little Kids in the worst way. All I was was a special kind of Human Being to be honest. I dislike even saying things like that, but I have to face up to what I really am. I mean Anybody that would stand there and stare at Sheila and then run back into the room and jump on top of Her, stand there and stare at Nancy and then walk away confused while She cries, along with the numerous times in My past that I have done dumb things, is a retarded Person. People this hurts like Hell, My eyes are watering pretty good here. They are allowed to mess with My life on Television? This seems unreal, but I have seen enough to know for a fact They are doing so. As I said I told Jon Pierson to tell Them to say 'Eeeaah!' and They did. Remember Tyler Perry's show saying "Grandpa Kelly says Eeeaah!"? These People are not normal in the eyes of a Man and that is a fact. "The kind of Girl that makes You feel like a Man.", I've run into a few. I have said it before and I say it here again, I am not known as a Full Grown Man, but I do know the difference between Grown and Children. And now I'm gonna say something in the hopes of pissing some Jerk off that wants to change America and Our beliefs, Merry Christmas. With that said good night, Kelly.

Leave My life alone!

   I had to get on the computer and say something just because of a commercial I just saw, "The Nut Job.", is a brand new movie coming out. I know I can not prove that Richard Pattison is behind this, He's too smart to put His name on anything , but I know He is doing this. "Richard Pattison, Killeen Texas."? "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly!, Ah I wanted the Magilla Gorilla!"? This shit was old a long time ago Folks. I really hate the existence known as My life here, I have attempted suicide as I say. This is the kind of crap that could push a Guy over the edge, seriously. "A Man is a Man.", and thid child named Richard is getting a big kick out of what He does and what He has done. I know He feels He is untouchable, but Richard, I'd touch You Son if I see You again, and I am not speaking of anything nice either. I swear if this continues I will kill one of these People for a fact. TAKE THESE MOTHER FUCKERS DOWN NOW!!! You People reading this do not understand what I say when I tell You how mad I am right now writing this, a murder may very possibly be committed. No Fucking Shit, Kelly John McGill.

Damn My luck

   I am sure a lot of You out there really don't care much for what I have to say, but I can't help but do what ever it takes to bring these Boys down. I am sick of doing this but as I have said I can't just up and quit. I am nearing 7000 page views now, so at least I am being read. Even at that I wonder if it's even worth it. I gotta go, sometimes this is so damn depressing it takes it's toll on a Guy.

Hello again

   Yep, I'm still here. Waitin' for Monday to start the job. It is going to be a good one for sure, I have worked for George before and He is the easiest going Man I have been around. And when I say Man I mean it, I am not one to use the word lightly. I have been around a lot of Today's youth that believe They are Grown, I am sure a lot of You understand when I say this too. I used the words here before, "Face up to the facts of life.", and I face the fact everyday. "If You're not honest You aint shit.", I believe I wrote a while back, those words were told to Me by a motorcycle Cop when I told Him I'd pay the ticket I had left unpaid. I paid it on the way home that day. People cry about the Police, I Myself have seen some Assholes wearing the uniform too. But one in particular I want to talk about. I used to let My tickets go until I wound up in Jail. I was pulled over another time by a motorcycle Cop and He arrested Me. He had to call another Officer to transport Me to Jail though. This Lady Officer was the nicest GAl You'd ever meet. She took Me all the way downtown, went in with Me and watched Me pay My fine, and then gave Me a ride back to My car. That My Friends is a Woman I'd back up. So see, not all those Cops are Pricks. C-Ya later,Kelly.

Kelly?

  Yep, I even wonder about Myself. I do believe I have struck a nerve with this stuff, It was harder then Hell to log in tonight. I feel kind of sorry for Hugh the way I have been ragging on Him. But You know? I don't think He is all that nice of a Person. In the first place He did tell Mylie Cyrus when She was fifteen She could pose nude for Him. If You told one of My Sisters that Mom would have went for blood, and Dad might have wound up in Prison. Life was'nt all that easy for Me, and Mom happened to be P.T.A. President for years. All of the Teachers knew Her well along with the Principal. She went to battle for the Girls a few times. Me? I knew to stay out of trouble with Her around. It says something about Billy Ray Cyrus Ya know, if You told My Daughter that We'd have problems. Any Man would be pissed off, let alone His Wife. That just goes to show You how society has become. Like this duck dynasty Fella getting thrown off of His own show for saying how He feels about Gays. Remember this Folks, it's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. Or, Silly Faggot, Dicks are for Chicks. This Country is becoming more and more immoral everyday. Time for a change, Kelly.

I will not be held down

   I mentioned the fact that I quit My job, So what You might say, well I finally found another, again, so what? I used to work for George when I was here last, this time it's a job on a custom home for the owners son I had been bugging Him about working on. The best thing about it is that They have the contract on the Casino enlargement here too. It's about damn time My luck turned, at least in the employment area. It's tough as Hell around here in the winter to find a job so I sure feel lucky. You know? I found out I was being under paid where I was after looking for work recently. The state pay for Carpenters is $20. an hour, I was getting $15. We'll see what Garth pays Me here. That is about all I wanted to say, no sense in griping about these Fuck Ups that screw with Me and bringing Myself down right? I sure do hope that You Folks have a great Christmas. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

At least I'm honest

   "Boy's will be Boy's.", is the way You explain Youth. Yes I was a Child, and still am in some ways. I was even the Kid that looked at My Sisters through holes in the roof. My Buddy Curt Burns from across the street and Me put models together in the attic, and no We did not sniff the glue. He was infatuated by My older Sister Kay and wanted to get a look, so We did. All in innocence.  Hell, My Dad never taught Me shit or that would have never happened I'm sure. He did tell Me a few things though, like respect Your Elders and never start a fight but always finish them. Other then that He really never told Me much. I leaned most of what I know from watching. Things like, "I'll wipe that smile off Your face.", and, "Don't smile when You say that." are two sayings I remember. Another one is, "I demand respect!", plus, "Respect is earned.". I do not have any respect for this Richard Pattison and His Pal Bill Rowley, They do not deserve any. As a matter of fact I don't respect Anybody that screws with a retarded Person. Kelly.

Honesty does'nt pay

   It seems to Me that because I am an honest Person I lose here. Maybe I should be a Scoundrel and be like Richard? I bet I'd win then. I really cannot understand why these People have not been taken down for what it is that They do to My life on television. I know, "Money talks and Bullshit walks.". Well I don't believe in allowing such an Ass as Richard to win. He among His Pals need to be in Jail and that is a fact of life. Hell Folks, I'm just a slow Kid that They thought it would be fun to screw with.

For My benefit

   The only reason I am typing right now is to cover My ass. Me and My big mouth have gave away patents before, so I am talking about an idea of Mine. Paint the color of concrete , both new and old. If You make a mistake or if You have a spill on concrete You paint over it. Mainly this is for Carpenters, when You pop a line and need to erase it an easy way to do so is to paint it, except usually it is in grey. I have mentioned this to People, one in particular is here in Riverton, Mike Rofskowski. I am claiming this as a poor Man's Patent. I know if You can prove the idea is Yours They will back You up and take it away from the Thief.

Persistance

   I really hate the way this Country is turning out to be. To find a job You have to be perfect in the eyes of most here. I like it the way I've always known it, and the way it should be. I might have finally found a job, even though it may only last for two or three months. I would much rather walk up to a Man on a jobsite and talk to Him than email Him an application on the computer. When You can talk to Him in person He knows what kind of a Person You are, not what Your last Employer tells Him. It does'nt matter if You've got a record, as long as You can make Him understand that You do know what the Hell You are doing You'll get the job. I still have to wait though, He just started a remodel job around the corner from Here and wants to get His crew going in the right direction before hiring Anyone. Being a local made Him interested, I know the city Inspector pretty good here. Cross Your fingers and hope I get the job right? C-Ya later, Kelly.

Still trying

   I really cannot believe that Somebody out there has not at least questioned this Pattison Kid. I tell no lies People. I am serious when I say I am known as a slow Person, and You had better believe Richard and Bill Rowley knew that for a fact. They are allowed to mess with My life on T.V.? Good Grief what is this Land becoming. Kids now days just think everything is humorous, that is the main reason I say a lot of the things I say here. I just hope to Hell some of Them decide to take a Grown look at the World.

Me?

   Do You want to know how I handle the way People are? I was working for the same People I just quit recently. I asked the Fella in charge something and when I started to leave the window I was talking through I heard Him say, "That's the Stupid Hand.". This bothered Me for a few days, until Me and another Hand were working on a roof and I saw Louis's face come over the edge of the roof. I jumped towards Him and stopped Myself in time from kicking Him in the face and sending Him back down the ladder. I did though in fact keep from hurting this Person. I tell You straight when I say that I must have covered six feet when I jumped. The whole aire about Us changed. I never showed up for work the next day because I knew I would go off on Him too. It says something about My abilities as a Carpenter though, I went back to work for this company years later. I know without being told that this same Person is a main reason I can't find a job in Riverton Wyoming at this time, there is work but it's for People that know Louis. I am sure He is bad mouthing Me. The applications I have filled out even in Cheyenne have to have this Guy for a reference, bad choice I'd say. What You have here is a Person that is usually made the Foreman on framing crews due to the fact that I bust My sorry ass and know what it is that it takes to et the job done. I can screw up sure, but I am a master Carpenter Folks. It looks to Me that I am going to have to go somewhere else to find a job. Oh well right. Have a great day Folks, Kelly.

Seriously

   I have one thing to say Today. When a Guy lives alone People wonder about His sorry ass, and it seems that He is helpless when trying to achieve justice in My case. "A Creep.", They may call Him, not here. A 'Creep.' in my opinion is some Jerk that Rapes and Molests, not a broken hearted Fool such as Myself. If I had enough money to afford to live properly I would not be alone. I can still go out, in the Cities, and be paid attention to by the opposite sex. You need to understand, My pride gets in the way of My happiness. I am as blind as a Fool can be too. Kelly McGill deserves a chance Folks, and I am not pulling My own chain either.

"Can Ya blame a Guy?"

   I have to try, and that is all there is to it. I rag on Hugh Hefner to the point of absurdity, I complain that nothing is being done about Richard Pattison with no hope in sight, and I refuse to end a life that is so miserable I can say without a doubt that most People on Earth would kill Themselves. But still I persist. "What does a Man feel like anyhow?" = "Pretty damn good!", "What kind of a Man are You?" = "A good one!", "When did You grow up?", "We all have to grow up sometime.", there are many different things to say and that is just a few. "Why do You ask?", and "If You need to ask nobody's going to tell You.", are a couple more. You see, I am a simple Bastard that knows what it mean to see through the Youth on this Planet, and Kids? If We don't straighten it out soon I feel We'll lose a battle in this Land that We really are'nt ready for. When I say this I am serious about what is really going on in America and the World around Us. I see a War coming to Our Land and We had better Goddamn face up to it. Not only do We have People crying Racist everytime You turn around, We are being infiltrated by Enemies from around the World. World War III? I am at the point that I cannot see anything except that conclusion, and many of You don't realize the truth. I for one am doing some real growing up in My life, I will not be a Drunkard again and it has been some time now since I last smoked any Pot. I hope it sinks in what it is that I am saying here tonight, We do not want to see millions of People ran over and left laying in the streets. God Bless You and have an insight to what lay before Us. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Ethics

   I have to admit I am not the greatest Person on Earth, but I am not a back stabber. I have a little story to tell about this Bill Rowley Character. I needed a place to stay for a few weeks and stayed at the apartment that Him and Ken Dodson shared. It takes a pure piece of shit to do what They did. They were infested with Crabs there, Yea I too came up having Them also. They had the nerve to just let Someone use Their bathtub and not even tell Him that They were there. That in My opinion is just mean. This Kid Bill Rowley? What a piece of work, back stabbing at it's best is when He just goes along with His Pal Richard and sets it up so I look like I am buying acid just for the enjoyment of doing it. Yes, I bought the crap, but I never went looking for the junk it came directly to Me. God Damn the whole lot of Them! These People deserve to be in Jail. Kelly.

Screwy Kid

   Yep, I am a screwy Kid. "Nice Guys finish last, so no more Mister nice Guy.", Anybody that knew Me when I was in school would tell You that I was easy to get along with, but Today I hate everything about My sorry life. "Misery enjoys company.", I agree, I want to make Richard and Bill the most miserable People on Earth. If I could put these two in Prison I would rejoice. "Forgive and forget.", not when it comes to the crime They committed. I cannot stay real mad about if They stole from Me, but doing what They did to My life is unforgivable. "A string of broken hearts.", should say something about Boys like Me. I never had a chance when it comes down to it. I was set up with acid and it fucked My life up bad. This Character Richard cam up with an idea to give Me two ounces of dried 'shrooms once. I just happened to have two weeks off due to a lack of work and not having any sense to begin with spent the whole time frying some more. I admit to My short comings, I am not the sharpest tool in the shed. Dino Martinez told Me a few years back that He was curled up in a corner scared of the Demons He was seeing while doing 'shrooms, I saw the exact same thing during those two weeks. I said for a long time after that period that I was really spun out because of that too. This is really the only time that I can say that Richard Pattison actually gave Me any harmful drugs, He was sure to be out of the picture the other times. Enough said for one day, I have to go.

Well?

   Is Anybody even going to question these People? I am serious about wanting to just walk up and kill one of these People.

Bonehead

   You want to know how I was before I was set up with all this L.S.D.? I was the easiest Guy You could find to get along with. It changed My life and that is a fact. Now I am an easy Person to anger. How sad can a Guy be? I was hating life and having to drive from Killeen to Hutto everyday. It was winter time in central Texas, not too cold as far as frigid temps. go, but the water running through My pipes at the trailer was so cold My head hurt after washing My hair. I went without bathing for a while because I did'nt really give a shit what People thought of Me. I stayed downwind from Them because I literally smelled like shit. That is about as sad as it can get. I never even thought about Whore bathing either. I did'nt have gas or lights for over a year there. I was always moving around Texas and Louisiana for work, so when They turned everything off I could'nt care less. You have to understand I was a miserable drunkard at the time. Depression? Just a little. Another thing that sucked was when I finished a Job I was usually caught up with just about everything. Then I would have to wait for two to three months for the next one to start. That was the reason I finally started driving a cab there. $50. a day was My average pay doing that, and I was one of the Drivers that could stay busy. You Folks out there that don't do the construction work, Hey, places like Texas are really getting run over. It is not a game. I left Texas for a few reasons, the main one being I was arrested for suspicion of D.U.I. and refused the test there for losing My license and job. I was buzzing more then I should have, but I had just drove over sixty miles without a drop. I made the mistake of getting pissed at some Driver and passed Them to get pulled over just a few blocks from the house. That will never be a problem for Me again though, a beer sounded good tonight when watching a western where They were drinking, I am through forever and I know it. Sure if I hit the lottery I would buy a bottle of champaine and finish it by Myself, but other then that I stay sober. I gotta go, Kelly.

Yea Yea Yea

   I am wondering about the World Today, Crooks run it.

Change of tactics

   Today I started something new, I started following some Churches and Human rights advocates. When I started following Police entirely My Followers increased. I have to stop following many of the People I am currently following to do so. So I stopped looking at all of the Police not in America to start with. I follow Cops, the F.B.I and Anybody I can think of to get justice. I really do hope this works because I hate My life, and I tell Myself that daily too. I have a will to live that has to be stronger than many, a lot of People would have killed Themselves by now. I'll hang in there for now though because I really do want to see what tomorrow brings. Kelly.

$1.60

   A buck sixty? That is what I paid Today when I never even had to do so. A lot of You out there might have blown it off, not Me because I am an honest person. I was at the local library and had some prints made of a download. I walked out and forgot to pay Them $.20 a page. When I went back to scan them and email them I remembered and paid Them what I owed. The Librarian said She had'nt even noticed. That's just Me. So when I say that Richard Pattison and Bill Rowley are guilty of the fraud They have committed I am to be believed. "Richard Pattison! Killeen Texas!" and "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly! Ah I wanted the MaGilla Gorilla!" pisses Me off Folks. I really doubt if I would be able to control Myself and not kill these People. I am disgusted with the way I have to write and write like this to even get Somebodies attention on this matter, bullshit!

Dammit!

   I am here writing with no where else to turn. I am a mess and it was done to Me. But it seems No one even cares. Oh Well, I am sure They say. He's just a dumbass Kid, so why worry? Well I care Dammit!

6223 page views

   At least I am getting People to read about My sorry trials in life. Still hoping to find a job, Nobody calls You back after You are honest and tell Them You have a record. Hey, I did'nt rape kill or molest a Child, I am just another unlucky Bastard on the face of the Earth that did something called drugs. Get rid of them Folks, they are no good and will cause You more problems than they are worth. A year in Jail is a year out of Your life, I know from experience. I threw some Meth away that I found in Reno. I also threw some away in Round Rock Texas once. I was doing the Job by Dell and had moved out of the house I built under a tree next to it. I was staying in Taylor with a Fella that was giving Me the crap. I did  a line and I knew right away that that crap was going to drive Me totally insane. I ripped the baggie open and dumped it on the ground. Then I moved out of Mike's house. Seriously Kids, that stuff is no good. Get a grip on Yourselves and Grow the fuck up. I have'nt touched any of that shit for years now, and won't. As far as drinking goes, I don't even have the urge anymore. Thank You God. Have a great life and stay away from the crap, Kelly McGill.

Sad Sack

   You really want to know what sucks in My life? Since 1982 I have been a miserable Bastard that cannot get a Woman named Nancy out of My head. Thirty plus years is hard for even Me to grasp. It seems so unreal, until You feel the pain. I see Her standing there with tears in Her eyes with a look on Her face asking Me why I can't say anything. Pain is a way of life for Me. I do understand that Everybody on Earth has some sort of heartache happen in Their life, but I know for sure that the pain I feel is rare. You'll have to see it from My view to completely understand. Every morning when I awake I see Her, obsession? No true love. "When You love Someone You think of Them.", is the truth. I attempted suicide once before, hung Myself with My shirt on the cell bars until I started to strangle. I even went to the hardest place in Tarrant county jail because of My thoughts and actions. I had made a knife out of a plastic spoon handle and had it to My jugular when a Co looked in and saw Me. They take You way down under ground and put this silly one piece suit on You. That is where They take the Crazies and the real hard asses too. First time in My life I found out what pepper spray was about, They mased some Asshole down the row from Me, Everybody gets a whiff of the stuff. Like I say I have felt like killing this Fool since the fifth grade because of the way My life has been. A few times a week I tell Myself that it's not worth going on for. I look at Myself and see the real Me Folks and I know I am worthy of a better life. I am at the mercy of the officials in America, please take these Boys down. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

I am here for real

   "Think like a Man.", I wonder if this Kid Pattison is behind that one. If You are Richard I have to say something about it, You do not think like a Man if You are messing with My life Son. I know You better than You think. We were at the rock quarry in North Austin once. It was near where I lived. These two Teenage Girls walk up and Richard strips down. Needless to say I was not a Man. I looked at Him and thought He was strange, but a Man would have kicked His ass for Him. Richard thinks He is a proper Adult I can tell, wrong My Friend. As I have said a few times before I do not actually like talking about this Person, I have a hatred boil up inside of Me when I think of Him. I know Myself pretty good and I can say for sure the way He angers Me I would'nt hesitate to kick Him in the crotch and catch Him with an uppercut into the nose for doing what He has done to My life. And I really cannot understand why it is that He is getting away with screwing with My life. Good God, I can't even get Hefner to call the Law on Me. Kelly McGill here saying goodnight.

Bullroar!

   Yes I feel it is a bunch of crap that I have to do this in order to bring down an Ass. Richard Pattison is nothing more than a Hotshot Kid. Liars do not deserve to win Folks. I am as honest as a Fella can be. I may have a felony for drug use, but I do not lie. These People did what They did to My life. And Today They screw with Me? Anger is real! "Boy's will be Boy's." is not an excuse.

Help!

   That is what I seek here, help. I understand I may never achieve it, People just don't give a shit in America it seems. "Just smile about it.", Bullshit, I really hate a Person that smirks about My demise, I have a saying of My own, 'You wonder why They kill Americans.', think about it.

Well?

   Man, I cannot believe the crap that goes on in America Today. "Moonshiners" for one. You have this Guy Tickle that drives around drunk on this show and Nobody says anything. Hell these Guys are making it rich and committing crimes on National television. Good Gravy! And a poor Fella like Me wants justice and gets none, Bullshit! What have We become? Most of Today's People just look at it as a joke, Grown Up's don't find it amusing Folks. I am outraged at the They this Land is turning. We are on the verge of a very serious War here Folks, and don't think it's just going to blow over either. People are coming into America on a daily basis, and They are here to kill. "Warista", is Spanish for Warrior. I have b had this word said as I walk by twice on apartment jobs, once in Texas another time in Louisiana. And again in Nevada while in a restaurant, this time it was a Child with It's Family. I told You about walking into the F.B.I. office in Austin Texas and leaving a letter. As I say, when I left there I had two separate feelings, one was the feeling of a Grown Man, the other was a Patriotic feeling. I Myself do not believe that this Obama Fella is an American either. He speaks nice and clean, but I have known Pot runners straight out of Mexico that spoke such perfect English that all of U s there said after They left that it was too perfect, too practised. I for one see that Our future holds some ugly times, unless We do something soon. Kelly.

Still tryin'

   "The Pot calling the Kettle black.", is a good saying. It has a good lesson to it. "Hopelessly in love.", is another one. Then You have, "It does'nt make Me feel much like a Man.". Others are, "That old Girl grew.", or, "Tell 'em to go to Hell.", They all have a meaning to them. The one I like is, "God damn love.". I'll keep it short and sweet Today, You Folks have a great day, Kelly.

A lost soul

   Over six thousand page views and almost three years in the making. In March it will be three years that I have been doing this, that might just get it done. I doubt it though. It just seems that I write and write to no avail. Dammit! Well maybe I found a job at least. I hope to Hell all My work paid off today trying to get all the proper paper work into Cheyenne. $25. an hour starting pay is what I'm talking about. With cash like that I could afford to live a little. It's amazing how little You spend when You don't drink Yourself blind, and I never will again. That is one thing I am confident about too. Like I said keep Your eyes open for the Truckers hideaway boot soon. I think I got it figured out. I plan on at first setting up at gun shows and seeing how that works. First off I have to have a boot made especially for People to see, then I can go forward. I tried My damndest to get a boot maker to go into business with Us, I had a couple of bites but that was all. Without money up front You're out a luck. So I'll try it by having one custom made and go from there. Wish Me luck, cause with My luck I'll sure as Hell need all I can get. C-Ya later, Kelly.

Dang it anyhow!

   I know You Folks look at Me as if I am absolutely knutts to bother Hugh Hefner, but I hate how these People can screw with a Guy like Me and get away with it, nonsense! There are a lot of People involved with this crime, and I don't even know most of Their last names. Willy worked with Us and hung out at the apartment. He finally wound up with Jeanie. Franny lived at Reagon Hill apartments, as did Roy Whom Kevin and Scott got the Black Molly from that weekend. Then there was Billy Hanson, He was in a band with People at Reagon Hills. Richard soon had Him set up at My apartment, this Kid is a bad ass on percussion. I said it before with Billy along We really had a chance. Richard is an exceptional Guitarist, and Bill Rowley can play too. I had the Bass set up when They made it to Texas and had already figured out a few things. Songs were an issue though. I would'nt give a plug nickel for anything They had written then. It took Me until '83 before I really wrote anything worth salt. 'Some People' I mentioned before, it is about the Marines getting killed in Beruit. I swear to God I was going into the Marines if We went to War. It starts out, 'Where You gonna run? Where You gonna hide?', it really fits in with Today's problems when I listen to it now. But it all seems for not, Nobody wants to see a Fool succeed I feel. I don't know if You can go to the Library of Congress and ask to hear My music, You might like it I don't know. Just ask for Bad Elvis, He's copyrighted under that name. "A bad Elvis impersonation" kicked My ass, I laughed pretty hard when I thought of that name for a group. My other choice would be The Wayward Boys, it might still go on the road. Have a good one Folks, Kelly.

Hell!

  Yes My life is a Son of a Bitch! I am an innocent turd at the age of fifty three. I really still clam up around Ladies. Even though, every now and again I can carry on an Adult conversation with a Woman, I still freeze most of the times. Coward anyhow. I have to be honest, I may not be insane, but there is definitely serious problems going on here, and They were created. My name is Kelly McGill and I tell You the story of My life. It is known as a life in which many People would have ended years ago I have no doubt about that. But I continue with this existence because of My will to see the future and what it holds. I know in My heart that Tomorrow holds a brighter view then the one I have Today. I sincerely thank those of You that read this, and I really hope some of the things I say have an impact on lives out there. I play no Kids game here Folks, drugs are a disgrace and should be destroyed for sure. I see things different than any Human on Earth, I cannot explain what I actually see in My mind but I can at least say that My thoughts are jumbled. Today I see things clearer than I did in the eighties, so I can say that time heals. But irreversible brain damage is not a joke. People, don't screw up Your life. Sincerely, Kelly McGill. Thank You.

America the beautiful

   I hate to say it but We are looking at a War on Our soil. When I see this Obama character doing what He does I see it clear. I know most of the crap You see is unlikely the real story, but when I see Him saluting like Hitler He really needs to go. I am not a white supremist, just a concerned Citizen. I see picture of His followers, Kids this is the wrong Person to believe in. I saw the one where He bows down to foreign leaders too, it shows weakness in Our leadership. They keep talking about gun control, knock it off I say. Here in Wyoming the state passed a law stating any federal agents try that here and They go to jail. Now this Obama wants to raise the debt ceiling and eliminate the term limit for the President. He admitted to being a Radical before He was elected, and now He is proving it. I do not believe that He is an American at all, in the first place everything He seems to do is against America. I wrote about how They want to cleanse America, that in itself may be the reasoning for leaving this Person in office. The more He pisses People off the closer We are to the War They want. As far as racist, "The Bro must go!", is a statement from a Black Man. I say  Their whole plan is to allow People to enter America and get Us mad enough to fight. It's getting closer everyday Folks. Kelly.

Hell on wheels

   Yep, Hell on wheels. That about explains the simple life of Kelly McGill. A roller coaster ride that's for damn sure. One thing after another. Hell, I can't even fall in love right. What a bitch. Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll, only without the loving part. Sociably unacceptable as Bill Rowley always went around saying. He also said "It's only Rock and Roll but I like it.", quaint. Whatever in the Hell quaint means. Have You noticed how a lot of commercials You see either have a Musician, or else a Guitar around Someone? Coincidence? I doubt that. I believe this Pattison Kid is involved with commercials and does it on purpose. That may be how Brian Foley got Himself into a Taco Bell commercial. This one is around four years old now. It is one about the fiery tacos. At the beginning this Fellow gets His face right up close to the camera. A clean cut, nice looking Guy. At the end He is hit with the spray of a fire extinguisher. I know for a fact that the second Fella is Brian. The first one may have been after He was cleaned up. Brian never really gave a damn about His appearance all that much. If You shaved His little goattee off and fixed His hair that might just be Him at the beginning. It is definitely Him in the latter part of the commercial. Richard is the kind of Person that would come up with something like that. Well at least You can look at it and see what a fruitcake looks like, like I said Brian was in the University of Texas's newspaper for crawling into a tree on campus naked. This is a dear Friend of Richard Pattison's too.  I will end with saying this last thing, God bless Us all, for I feel We are in deep shit because of the way things are being run, Amen.

5880 pageveiws

   Well at least I am getting Someone to read about My sorry life, I really doubt if it will do any good, but I just can't quit. These People I speak of really think They're smart. It really does'nt take all that much smarts to out smart a retarded Kid though. These People are nothing more than Users Folks. If I had something They were My Pals, but once They had a chance to screw Me? I seriously don't like talking about this, but God Dammit I have too. I hate My life is what I say to Myself daily, and I mean it too. I have read where John Wayne even said, "Life's tough, and even tougher when You're stupid.", Damn! We have the nicest People in America. I realize I am more than likely just seeing People read My silly ass pages. I know I'll never bring down some rich Bastard in the real World. Those are the breaks right? I tell You no lie when I say that I hope these People meet Their demise, and soon. Kelly.

Holding on

   I still can't get an even break. Holy crap! I am the Victim here, not a Vilian. These People deliberately set Me up with enough acid to screw My life up and then get away with it? I am sure that the Playboy was telling Me to show back up at the Marriott that night and be straight. These little fuckers made damn sure I was frying good before I was even given the Playboy. That in itself is a crime. As I say, They gave Me that Magazine after They had Me buzzing. People always say, "If I had it to do all over again.", I tell You here and now there is no way I would be taking any drugs, really. Drugs are a dangerous plight on the World. If You think You are cool to do these things You are nothing more than a Child. Hell, I was an innocent Teenager when I was set up with acid the first time. Like I said before I had never done any before, nor had I any thoughts of doing any. These People knew I was a slow Kid and used Me for Their gain. And now They are kicking back with wealth in Their pockets and I suffer through life? Good God! These People deserve nothing less than a Prison sentence. I can hear this Bill Rowley saying, "We were'nt even there!", I can't prove it but Richard Pattison is the brains behind this and Bill Rowley is the boot licker that does His bidding for Him. I want justice more than any of You probably comprehend. As I say, when I see how They screw with My life on the Television and in Movie's, which is odd in the first place, I get furious People. These Two deserve a bullet and nothing less. Kelly!

One question

   I have a question, why do certain People get away with crimes while other pay for Their wrong doings? Even Gay People have more rights it seems then a Fool like Me, and that is wrong. There are immoral things going on and People accept it as normal. That in itself is absurd. In today's society Kids talk about Their love lives, I learned that it is disrespectful to a Gal to talk about Her sex life, but hey, Kids don't give a rats ass today. I know not all Kids in America are these little Bastards that think They are something special, You do see responsible ones every now and again. I have one thing to say about what these Boy's did to My life before I am through today, what Richard Pattison and Bill Rowley did to My life is a killing offence, and that is known as a fact of life. Kelly.

Why do I try?

  I really wonder about a Guy that insists on telling His darkest secrets just to bring down some Jerk that messed His life up, and then continues to screw with Him. But what else can I do short of killing Somebody? "The Waterboy" is more than likely one of Richards shows, I told You about My high school football career. I was the bench warmer for sure. One thing I can say is that if I got My hands on You You were going down. I never was a blocker, but I never missed a tackle. "Truman" is another one. I never played the so-called "Game" that Kids play, so I was the one left in the dark. Just like Truman He never knew He was a special case. "Our Idiot Brother" maybe? I know I'm just throwing things out here, but "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly!"? I know for a fact that this is about Yours truly. I garuantee that if You were to look into Jon Peirson in Pflugerville Texas You would find a cyber trail straight to this Pattison and Rowley. He had to have been the one that said where I had My tent pitched in Austin when the old Boy came in yelling My name. I seriously ask Somebody to take these People down before I decide I have had enough and go kill Someone, really!

Damn Hick anyways!

   I have to say I learned something about My Sister Kay tonight. We were sitting around talking after all the Kids went to bed when My youngest Sister asked Kay the one a few years older than Myself how Her and Gordy Her Husband had met. I was quite surprised when She talked about Their first date. They went to dinner then went and had a few drinks. While at Al's Gas lite They danced, She said it was as if They were the only two on the dance floor. I have been there too. When I was looking at this Woman in love with Me on the dance floor in the Dallas night club in Austin I saw nothing else but Her. Everybody else was oblivious to Me. You would have to be there to completely understand. True love is a reality and that My Friends is a fact of life. I tell no lie when I tell You I really do wake up every morning with Her on My mind, and that was in 1982 when I met Her. I have been a totally lost Child for the past thirty plus years. I insist on going on through sheer stubborness for sure. If You have never really been in love, it is quite a feeling. Even though She is'nt here She still brings a smile to My face. "When You're in love, that's all You can think of.", is straight up fact. I remember a few words I have been wanting to share that I learned as a small Child, including the ones I just wrote down. "I sure have a lot to learn.", "That's not very Manly.", "Wet behind the ears little Girl.", 'That's a Girl if I've ever seen one.", '"I need a Girl like I need another hole in My head.", 'I'm lost without You.", "Lost and lonely.", "That old Girl grew.", "Smart allecky Kid.", "Good for nothing Kid", "That Man's a Kid." and many others are in My mind from the time I was three. I told You about the Puppy scaring the Hell out of Me, that's the only way I can explain Me being so attentive at that young age and being able to watch and listen to everything around Me. I have live an amazing life, even with it's heartaches it has been an astonishing life. I hope I open the eyes to a lot of things with My little blog here and let the Youth see the real Grown Adults, as I have said the truly Full Grown People have a feeling I cannot explain, You just have to see it to understand. Have a great life Folks, sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Damn!

   I'm still here? What the Hell is going on? I can't do a thing about Richard Pattison. I am fed up with this crap. Tough luck I see. Well maybe Tomorrow, because I sure as Hell am not quitting Tonight. Kelly.

Wednesday November 27th 2013 11:47 a.m.

   All I can say is I am sickened by the way this Country is turning. We have a Government that a large number of Us are embarrassed by, and that My Friends is sad.

Damn Kelly!

   I am sure I am getting cussed pretty good by Hefner, I just bug Him to show You that I am right when it comes to being approached by Him. If I were making it up it's like I said before They'd be hollering harassment. I seriously can't get over how He ignores Me. When I first started contacting Him I was the nicest S.O.B. about it, but now I really could'nt care less How He feels about Me. I have good news for Ya, I still am staying sober. I drank one beer around two weeks ago and only then because it was in My cooler and I refused to just throw it away. I still know in My heart that I can stay dry too, I have no desire to go out drinking. In My twenties and thirties I was a raging Drunkard. I lived to drink in fact. If I had twenty bucks on Me I was going to the Bar. There was one winter where Me and Mike Durgin were both unemployed but We stayed drunk. His Dad let Him use His backhoe and dump truck. We made enough to go to Town and hit Al's Gaslight where We'd play a poker machine and clean up. We would walk in with maybe thirty bucks between Us and stagger out with around thirty a piece when We were done. Frigid Wyoming winters in a dump truck going to Town without a heater, We felt no pain going home, or the cold. Like I said I was a Punk that thought He could actually drive home drunk, I do not even think about it now. You see I have done some growing up in My life, even though most of the time I still feel like a Child. I am Man enough to grow, stopping the drinking is My proof on that. You Folks have a great night, I gotta go, Kelly.

Good luck gone bad

   I hate My fucking life. Really. Even when I am the luckiest Bastard on the face of the Earth, I still lose. Just today I tried to have My brake drums ground. I had to buy new ones and did'nt have enough to buy two. So the Guy at the parts store sells Me two of them at $15. a piece. When I get to the house the center hole is too small. I go back He gives Me two more but the holes for the studs are too small. At least I saved $70., but now I have to grind the hole to make it fit. He did say even if I do so He'll honor the warranty. Figures. Talk about luck, I am set up with something in My life and I get the shit end of the stick. Holy crap, what Friends I wound up with. I really do hate to go on and on about My silly ass life, but Hell Man I deserve better. I have to say that if Craig Furguson had'nt of said, "Richard Pattison, Killeen Texas!", I would have never even thought about what these People were doing to My life, Thanks Craig. Now I have this pure hatred inside of Me for these People that I know will never leave. Fuck letting it go and forgiving. People that say that don't have a clue what My life is about. Here I am a spaced out Kid and They live the high life and screw with Me. I have tried My damndest to take these Fools down. I started at the top too. I went to the U.S. Marshals in D.C., the thing is I went on the web and found one of the top dogs. John Clark is the Man in charge of investigating all the other Officers when They screw up. It did'nt do any good just like this. But so help Me I will bring down these People, just short of Murder, I hope.

What next?

   What can I say, I gotta say something. It is tougher then You think to keep this interesting. I have depleted all My sorry ass life stories. Even though I am sure I can think back and find something that happened in My life that I might be missing. Damn, I am sitting here really trying to think of something. I should do like I did when I was living in the streets of Santa Monica. I would make sure I put notes in My phone daily so I would remember what I wanted to say everyday. I think of stuff during the day still but when it comes time to write My mind is a blank. If I were a Liar I'm sure I could make up something clever to say, but I am not nor will I be. Other then that, You Folks have a good night. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Still here.

   I at least am getting readers I see. One week ago I hit 5000 pageveiws and already I am at 5485, wow! I really don't have anything to say tonight, sometimes I feel I have to get on here so People know I'm still alive. I really can't get over how I can pester Hugh Hefner in such a manner and He still does'nt at least tell Me too shut up. I aint lying when I say it has been years either. I started trying to get in touch with Hugh in 2001, no bull. I sent hand written letters to Playboy in Chicago. I have sent so many emails to that Boy it is ridiculous. I used to, and know I will again, contact Them through Their main site. I do it now just to piss the Asshole off. I really should'nt call Him an Asshole without knowing Him, for one thing He did try to contact a Dumbass Kid. My Friends? What a lot? They set Me up so I could become a Musician, Fuckers! I hope to Hell Karma bites 'em hard. Have a great night Folks, Kelly.

Seriously!

   I can't catch a break. Holy crap! I tell Hugh Hefner He's a piece of Shit and it does'nt seem to tick Him off. I doubt if He is'nt mad, He just can't do a damn thing because He's involved with this cover up. I can bet money that money was involved and Richard was just handed it. I say this because of that Party I walked into, those were wealthy People there. I told You about the Man behind the Gal I was talking to, He never took His eyes off of Me the whole time. He sat there and smiled at Me. This was a true Man too, He had the feeling. He is the type I can tell that would have tried to help Me out in life. I have no proof but I know I was ripped off. I thought it was strange when all of a sudden Brian Foley's Mom was a Millionaire over night. They got the Hell out of Riverton Wyoming too. An d now Richard Pattison is rubbing elbows with these wealthy People and rubbing it in. If I was set up with wealth and He wound up with it He is in possession of stolen property. I would love nothing more then to see these People sit in Prison for a few years. I seriously cannot understand why He and His Cronies are allowed to screw with My life on Television and nothing is being done. Who in the Hell is receiving a bribe out there? I know there are honest Cops in America, but We all know there are Crooks in the field also. God Dammit I am Mad as Hell about all of this crap!

Huh!

  I can send Hugh Hefner a message and call Him a piece of shit and He looks the other way? If I were making this up He would have Agents knocking on My door. Rich People? They think They're untouchable. This is a sickening World We live in that's for damn sure. I am disgusted with all of it. Here I sit and watch this Asshole Richard screw with Me and I have My hands tied, what a crock! People I am a Victim here and I demand justice! I am so pissed off right now, this is a farse for sure. Hell, They joke about it as if it were a Man to do so. I tell You right here and now a Full Grown Man does not find this amusing. Nor will He recognize these People as Adults. Immaturity runs rampant in America and that is a fact of life. I have mentioned suicide a few times before. Tonight My heart ached so bad for Nancy I had the thoughts again. One thing that keeps Me going is the future, I see a War on the horizon and I want to be here for it. I know that does'nt sound right, but it keeps Me alive. This Country is on the verge of collapse due to the management of it. We allow other lands to overrun Us and then cry about it when it's too damn late. This Obama character is leading Us down a path of destruction. They cry Racist, Buddy I hate that shit. For years now We have heard other races talk crap, They want a War here to cleanse America I have said it before. It is history repeating itself, population control. Well You do know where all these rich Bastards will be, hidden. While the regular People will be getting killed. I have said enough.

Depressing to say the least

   My Life sucks, I really hate to work on vehicles. Everytime I fix something I either have to do it again or something else fucks up. I was feeling pretty good about doing My brakes the other day, while in there I figured I had better check the oil in the rearend. Well it did'nt look so good so I took off the cover only to find I have three chipped teeth on the ring gear. I put new oil in it and test drove, seeing as it was running I thought I'd wait until I get the money before I fix it. Not a chance, now I have a loud noise that was'nt there before. I don't trust it to go across town. The luck of the Irish right? This Life has been nothing but a farse for sure. Depressing? Do You even need to ask? Every cent I have to My name will be spent by the time I put another rearend in. $300. to a lot of You is chicken feed I am sure, but that breaks Me. What really bothers Me is that I am not supposed to be the Loser, fate sucks. I refuse to give in though for I will come out on top somehow.

Justice?

   Hell, I can't even get Geraldo to talk to Me. Do You want to know something about this Rowley Kid. We were sitting in Casper Wyoming once, there were two Gals at the table with Us and this Kid says out loud, "I'm hung.", all I could do was to look at Him. What a Freak I say. If You said something like that in front of a Woman like Nancy I would have to challenge a Boy for it. Arrogance is a way of life, one inwhich I have no respect for either. I have only high hopes, even though I do doubt, that this is going to have the right effect on these People and see Them in Jail. As I say I doubt it even though I am hopeful. I sure do hope the Kids out there realize that I play no game too, stay the fuck off the drugs, period. Kelly.

This still sucks!

   I am here? Why? It seems to do no good at all. But what the Hey, I gotta try right? I can't even get Hugh Hefner to call the Cops on Me, Damn! If I were in Southern Cal right now I'd go knock on the gates of the Mansion again just to piss Him off. It really bothers Me that He sent Me that Playboy and now ignores Me, Hell Hugh I never asked for Your attention Pal. I think I know what that was about. I bet money I was supposed to go back to the Marriott and see some People so They could see what I was like when I was'nt frying on acid. But no, these little Bastards set Me up with enough L.S.D. to fry an Elephant and then gave Me the Playboy. Their damn lucky I did'nt read it too. If I would have read that and it said do not show up doing drugs I would have lost it on Kevin and Scott for a fact. I tell You no lies here Folks. I can understand, as I have said before, that when I say I was handed a Playboy with a story, or whatever it was, about Me is hard to believe. Again I have to say that there is no way on Earth that I would go to these lengths, and I sure as Hell would'nt be bothering Hugh Hefner, if it were a lie. This shit pisses Me off when I think of how I was railroaded by My own Friends. It's just like John Dorral told Me once, "Don't trust Anybody.", wise words. I know there are no redoes in Life, so I am stuck with the Life created by what was done to Me and I deal with it the best I can. People say to forget and forgive, Bullshit! These People deliberately set out to destroy My Life and nearly succeeded with Their task. As I have said if I had done the Ether They asked Me to do I would be a slobbering Imbisile sitting in a mental institute for the rest of My Life. Thank God I had enough sense to know better than to do the junk. I'm out a here, this really does suck. Kelly.

Hell if I know !

   Well? What can I say Today? I sure wish I could win the Lotto, that's a fact. I remember a time when a Guy just asked for a job and was hired, today? They want You to get on the computer and tell Them Your life story, and then go piss in a cup. I can pass a drug test no problem, but if You have one blemish on Your record You might as well panhandle. You wonder why there are so many Homeless out there? They don't have a home for one, People look down on Them. I did get a job while Homeless the first time I went to Santa Monica. I was hired as a Carpenter and once hired asked if I can do anything else. I was put in charge of a shovel digging an 8x8 hole six foot deep. After digging for two days He tells Me that He has a tool for knocking the dirt loose. Then after shoveling it out of the whole for all that time He tells Me He wants it all moved to the dumpster sitting out side of the fence all this time. It would have been a bit easier to throw it into a wheelbarrow the first time. After doing this all week I looked at the fence next to Me and realized He could have brought a backhoe in and dug it in one day and used a Bobcat to move the dirt, no They want You to kill Yourself to save a buck or two. I walked off the job. Myself? When Guys work for Me and I am making money no matter what They get forty hours. I usually buy breakfast and give Them a bonus every week too. You know I'd still be in Texas sub-contracting right now if I could, but it is getting to the point that You wait too much for work to start. I got sick of working enough to get caught up and then waiting for a job to start and winding up so deep in pawn it takes the half the time on the job to catch up again. I finally went to driving a cab. That was'nt a bad job in Killeen, except there are way too many cabs. I was lucky to make $50. a day. Sure when the I.R.S. looks at it You were making a lot according to what is turned in, but You pay for Your own gas cutting it down immensely. Enough for today, I'll C-Ya later, Kelly.

Can Ya blame Me?

   This Richard Pattison is a Squirlly S.O.B. to say the least. He always thought He was the best around. I hate having to talk about it like this, but what else can a Guy do? I'm making it short and sweet Today because I have to go do My brakes. I'll bitch some more later, Kelly.

Something I just have to say.

   You know, We have People that want to see America fall. I Myself will stand till the end for this great Country, but I see what it is that They hate. We have People like this Richard Pattison that like to mess with those They feel are defenseless. Then We have People like this Hugh Hefner, They are allowed to expose the Girls nude like They do. The Female body is an attractive thing when in fine shape, of course. But it really is an abnormal thing to be able to make it rich by exposing it. Of course there are worse items out there like Pornos and even Hustler. At least Hefner does have some taste in what He shows. But as it is it is wrong in reality. People say the buy the magazine for the articles, I believe Them too. I have read quite a few of His articles and They can be enlightening to say the least. Even though I have read quite a few of His cartoons and some are in bad taste because They ridicule People like Myself. I have contacted Hefner so much it is hard to believe I have not been contacted by the Police. I have called Him out, told Him He is not a Man, and called Him a Pervert just to get Him mad enough to do something. Mainly I would love to get these People in court just once, I know for a fact Richard Pattison set Me up and now He's rubbing elbows with the wealthy People in Hollywood and laughing at Me for what I have become. Come to Wyoming Richard! I know He would'nt do such a thing. Richard has'nt been around here much since He ran away from Home at sixteen. His Dad knew how immature He was and would'nt let Him get a drivers license so He did what spoild Children do, He ran away from Home. I almost did once but got caught in the act, I needed to. I told You how My Sister Lois used to scream at Me. I might have told about the day My Mom threw My album across the roo. She said turn it down, I did but not enough for Her. She stormed into the room and said "I told You to turn it down!" and threw it. It was a birthday present from My two older Sisters, more then likely Kay mainly. After She left the room I started packing. Before long She came back in to tell Me She was going somewhere and saw what I was up to. The moral of the story is to be nice to Your Kids Dammit, They hurt inside for a long time after. Kelly.

Mess with that Guy!

   The Cave Dude is what I was called around '95. Tim Pruedomme worked with Us and liked to talk down to Folks. I still have that problem where I hold My temper. Not always as I said before, but when You have to work with Someone You bite Your tongue at times. Now I see "It's so easy a Caveman can do it.". Who knows if all these things are out there just to screw with Me or not, but I know for a fact that there are certain ones that are. I told Jon Pierson to tell Richard to say 'Eeeah!' and it was said on Tyler Perry's show, "Grandpa Kelly says Eeeahh!", is blatantly saying it. They use My name and all. "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly! Ah, I wanted the Magilla Gorilla!" is another example of Their abusive actions. I am dead serious when i say I really want to hurt this Pattison Kid. I have a five year old Nephew, Ethan, He has been diagnosed as Autistic. He even thought that some Kid pushed His older Brother down and tore into Him. They had to pull Him off, the Boy would have beaten Him without stopping Folks. That is the way of Us slower People like Me and Him. I want nothing more than to see justice done. To change the subject. I told You about Our boot holster, well We got a hit on Someone interested in them. A Fort Worth boot maker contacted Me Today and I sent Him pictures of Our home made version. Cross Your fingers. To all You Officers out there, this is a holster sewn directly into the boot on the inside of the leg. A real easy access when needed, better than the ankle type. So keep Your eyes open for Them. Have a great weekend, Kelly.

Here again.

   Dammit all to Hell! I just sent enough tweets to Hugh Hefner that He really should be pissed off about Me. I know for a fact He will not press charges on Me for harassment due to the fact that I speak the truth and They do not want it known. I am an innocent Victim here of a crime that I want to take to the top courts if I can. I will not give up People. I think of this Richard Pattison and get so mad I know for a fact that I would grab Him by the throat and rip it out. I can't help it. When I realize He is out there and getting away with what it is that He and His Partner Bill Rowley did I want blood. It is disgusting how People get away with crimes if They have money, it is truly sickening. I am an honest son of a Bitch if nothing else in My life, and I deserve a chance. I truly hope these Boy's don't approach Me because I would be locked up for Murder. Kelly McGill says so here and now.

This morning.

   Do You want to know what sucks? When You are dreaming of the Woman that loves You and You wake up from the dream. That is what happened this morning. Nancy is on My mind so much I have dreams about Her all the time. I hate life when You wake up alone from such a dream. I am sure You all know what pain feels like, but I doubt if any of You can completely understand the agony of such a dream. I live with a life that is so screwed up I am really surprised I even live. I have to push on though, like I said before it might just be Tomorrow that I win it all. Enough said, this is depressing. Kelly.

My most important letter to date, Kelly.

   I was laying awake in bed and thinking of the World as it is Today, and it scares the Hell out of Me. Here We are on the verge of all out War on the soil of the United States, nearer than most realize. This is a sobering fact of Life. We as a Nation are full of Believers in the word of a book known as the Bible. In this book there are stories beyond the beliefs of many normal People. I for one see it in a manner of My own. I believe Jesus walked the Earth, but I have My doubts that He actually did the things written. A fairy tale of sorts is what some perceive it as. Then We have the People on Earth that feel the Karaan is the right way. These People are insane beyond reason. I have read enough of it to understand They want blood. I can see why They want to hate America, We allow Gay marriages for one, immoral is what that is. But We do not condone the raping of Women and Children, nor do We say it is okay to commit murder. We do have some sense of sanity Here. I am wrong to say some sense, for there are many among Us that are rational Adults. We are under attack in America by People that are trying to take control of the World in My opinion, and the only way They can do that is to destroy the powerhouse We are. Islam is a serious threat to the World, not only America, but to all decent People. I for one say that We need to eradicate the World of this Problem before it becomes unstoppable. And if the President of the United States backs these People We are in deep shit. One thing these People need to understand is that We will win at all costs, that means We will blow up the World before We allow these type of People to gain control. And that My Friends is a fact. I hope You will join in with Me in a prayer. Our heavenly Father, We seek the strength to overcome the adversities We are being faced with. We are at a junction in Our history as a Country where We have to see clearly what it is that is right in front of Us. I fear many of Us do not understand what it is that We approach in Our future. I sincerely hope I am wrong, for I do not wish to witness what it is that I foresee. I ask for You to enlighten and open the eyes of the blind on Earth, be Them American or Whom ever. May the good People prevail over evil as it should be in a normal World. With the will of God We shall overcome this terror gripping Our lives. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

A born Loser!

  Yep, I lose, Again and again and again and again. It never fails, even when things go right I fall flat on My face. I have one to tell You here about when I was nineteen, before I was really a loser. Here I am crossing the street and I see a Cop, well I started squealing like a Pig. Once We got across the street I told Bill Rowley I wanted to go back. Well I walked back doing the same thing. When We reached the other side this Officer came over and shoved Me. I looked at Him and said 'I aint drunk and You can't do a damn thing about it!' and walked on by. A few months later Pat Lookingbill burned rubber and a Cop showed Him what power was all about by doing the same pulling into the parking lot. Later We were walking along and I saw that same Cop. I started squealing away and He pulled over in front of Us. I asked Him 'You must be new Here?' when He said He was I told Him 'I thought so.' and walked on by. Yep, I was a Hotdog back then. I thought My shit smelled like perfume, I was mistaken. Now I will, and have done, tell Officers that if I see Them in distress I will be the one stopping. If I see Someone shooting at an Officer I will without a doubt run His ass down. I was a Kid that did'nt have the sense God gave a Mule, and to this day I still don't show much. Even though I gave up he drugs and I am sticking to the sobriety. I don't even want to go out and drink a beer, I know in My heart I am finished with that nonsense. I have some more crap I aint proud of, I have over a span of thirty three years had three convictions for D.U.I. and two more I ran from. In the eighties a Guy could get away with it to a point and I never realized how stupid I was. Out of those there are only two I feel I really deserved. I admit I was not sober on any of them, but I still passed Their test before I was finally arrested. That My Friends is behind Me, I refuse to even drink a drop again. I was sober for a year and a half until I got around a so-called Friend, "Just one beer.", is what They say, a true Friend does not think it funny to see You jump off the wagon. If I see this same Fellow again I will tell Him to walk away from Me. I was, and still am, an innocent Human Being. I still have a problem talking to Women. I do know what it is to carry on an Adult conversation with Women though, but most of the time I just clam up. I feel I am unworthy, what Woman wants a dinged out Kid? Sad but true. Kelly.

The hard Life!

   If You can't tell by now, My life is what is known as a Mother Fucker. Excuse the course language but I am pissed off about all of this crap. These People are being allowed to mess with My Life and Nobody seems to be able to do a thing. I am dead serious when I say that I was camping out in Austin for a spell. One day while playing My guitar a Fella comes into My area yelling "Kelly! Kelly! Kelly!", around a year later I was watching the Simpson's and Homer is looking for His Wife Marge yelling, "Marge! Marge! Marge! Or is that Kelly! Kelly! Kelly!" and He finished by saying "Ah, I wanted the MaGilla Gorilla!", this My Friends makes Me so God Damned mad I want blood. I told You I went to Santa Monica just hoping to run into this Pattison Fella, I really hoped I would run into Him too. I said that I knew He is supposed to be in San Francisco, but I knew nothing of the place. Having been in Santa Monica before I knew exactly where I could eat daily. "Richard Pattison, Killeen Texas!" is another one that makes Me mad. These People are doing this to rub it in that I was'nt bright enough to know what it was that Hugh Hefner was sending Me the Playboy for. This is as serious a matter as there is in My opinion, I really want to hunt this Bastard down and put a bullet into Him Folks. The only thing that keeps from doing so to His Pal Bill Rowley is that I would rather see Them sit in Jail for a few years. I can say for a fact though that if I were to become terminally ill for some reason Bill would be killed before I went under ground. You really have to understand, this Child here is so blind at times that He breaks hearts of the ones that love Him. By God I am a retarded Person and I demand respect. I want these People in jail now.

More nonsense!

   I am pissed off. I told You about work being in Cheyenne, well I tried to get a job there today. This job is paying $32.21 an hour for qualified People. I was told since I have a record I was not going to be hired because the Air Force goes not allow Anybody with a record on Base. Bullcrap! I have worked on Base in Killeen Texas many times in the past, before I went to Santa Monica I was driving a cab on Base. It is ridiculous how it is in this Country when it comes to treating People right. I was refused an apartment once and the Gal pointed to the paperwork where it said I had a felony and was told, "That's the reason.". A Guy like Me gets run over and the People that commit real crimes like Richard Pattison and Bill Rowley walk away scott free, Bullshit! These are the times when I say to Myself that I should just end My life, but then I say to Myself that I might just win Tomorrow and keep plucking away. I plan on getting My record cleared through exspungement only it takes money. I know I can request a pardon too, again I need the cash. Give a Guy a break once in a while. I bet money that most of these People that blackball People have done the exact things I have, the difference is They never got caught. Less than a gram of Cocaine is a simple mistake, in actuality it was around two lines of the junk. I have'nt, and don't plan on doing, any of that crap for years now. It sure feels good to know I grew past that phase in My life. Kelly.

Holy Smokes, 5000 pageveiws!

   I am really surprised that People are actually reading this more than ever. If You saw it on My page I have contacted Hugh Hefner again, if I were lying about all of this there is no way on Earth I would go to such extremes. Like I said when I was in Santa Monica, I walked straight up to the gates of the Playboy mansion and requested an audience with Hugh personally. It still blows My mind that these Fellas can do this to My life and be accepted by Hefner and His crowd. All I was in life was a Kid that wanted to get along, and believe Me when I say that in itself was a tough thing to do. When You try to walk away from fist fights the Kids just push You all that much harder. I never really felt fear when confronted by the Boys, I just did'nt want to hurt Anyone. As I have said My first fight sent the Boy to the hospital. I snap kicked Him square in the nose without even knowing the word Karate at the time. The Kids around school after that started saying if You pushed Somebodies nose into the brain it would kill Them. Yes in four hours They will bleed internally until They die, but not instant death. I could see Ray Joe Lewis's Brother Dave starting that story. I still try to walk away, but the Kids in this land have to push a Guy like Me. I sure do hope someday They'll figure out that a Guy like Me really needs to be left alone. I am what is known as a natural when it comes to moving fast, Bill knew this for a fact too. He saw Me stop Billy Shlattery dead in His tracks on maid street here in Riverton. He also knew that I jumped off the ground and grabbed Rick Kranz before Rick could blink. They just have to try You and see if They can best a Fella. I am in no way a tough Guy, but when pushed I am a very dangerous Person, mainly because I study the Arts and it is a reaction to hit or kick when moved towards. What I am after is easy, bring these Boys down before We meet and I wind up in Prison for Manslaughter. Seriously, Kelly McGill.

What the Hell?

   I have no way out but to bring down this Richard Pattison Kid. I feel all is for not, but I can't quit. I was asked to join a Band when I did'nt even know how to play an instrument. As I have said I was home after work when I discovered Rushes 2112 sitting on top of the stereo. Before I could even start to play it Freda Mares came by with some acid, exactly like She did the weekend before when I found Pink Floyds Animals in the same manner. Within a few days Bill Rowley told Me that "Richard wants You to join in a Band.", suspicious is exactly what it is. I tell no lie when I say I moved to Texas and Kevin Childers a Friend of Bills that went along kept coming up with acid for Me to do. If You can't tell I was a slow Child, I never understood the side effects of doing L.S.D. or I would have never done the crap. I wound up crashing a Party in Austin and a week later, believe it or not, I was handed a Playboy. This Playboy in no way was a normal one to start with, the articles in it were interesting too. One stated "The Laws of Love." meaning no Gays allowed. Another was about the Lord of the rings, this told Me I was to be a Guitarist. I swear I browsed through that Magazine looking at every page in it, except for the article saying I had walked into the Party. While I was breezing through it I turned a page and it was a continuance of the main story, low and behold there is My name in print. I already knew it was about Me but I did'nt really care. The thing that really pisses Me off here is that I was set up with enough acid to destroy My mind, and once I was feeling the effects I was handed this Playboy and left alone. Buddy that Fucked My Life up. My mind has never been the same. I will not give up on justice, and the reason being is that I know it is obtainable if I find the right People to take charge. Again I would submit to a truth serum to prove My case. THank You for reading this, and pray that I prevail, Kelly.

A new Day

   To start with I wish to say thanks to all the Veterans out there, I still feel I made the mistake of not joining the Military when I was fresh out of school. Instead I became a damn Hippy. One that was so naive even My closest Friends thought it cute to screw with My life. My Family too. I was at My Grandfathers house doing something outside, when We finished My Dad wanted to go inside. I knew how My Granddad felt about long hair and said He would'nt want Me in there. Dad insisted and when We were inside My Grandpa sat with His back to Me and never said a word to Me. I realize it was all set up now. I finally cut My hair because of Him. My Family has a way of being cold to Me, but what does a Guy do? Disown Them? I am treated now in the nicest manner since I told the Folks off about the crap They pulling, even too nice to tell the truth. But it beats the Hell out of some of the crap They were doing. Well, enough of this junk for today. I hope You enjoy Your day out there, and everything is going good in Your life, sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Are You mad yet?

   I ask if You're mad, I sure as Hell am. One thing I figured out tonight though is that I am incapable of being a Killer. I was watching a show about a serial Killer and it did'nt take much for Me to realize that would not be Me. Yes I believe I could shoot Someone that deserves to be killed, I did go after a Rapist in Danville Indiana. And when I took the axe away from Thomas in Virginia it was after He had tried to hit Me in the head with it. Yes I went to Santa Monica to take Richard down, even though I knew I'd never find Him. If I really wanted Richard I would have went to San Francisco that's where He's supposed to be. In Santa Monica I was in reality trying to get noticed. Sure I want Him dead and would hurt the Boy bad, more than likely I would beat Him to death for the rage He causes. I was hoping I would run into Him really, but that was no more than wishful thinking. I garuantee that if He or Bill Rowley were to try and be friendly with Me I would lose it on Them. I can ear Bill Now, "Let by gones be by gones.", Hell Son You fucked My life up, do You think I am going to forgive? "Turn the other cheek.", not likely Pal. If nothing else I will break a bone for You, and You know I am very capable of taking You any day of the week in a fair fight. I write again about this because I am at a point in My life where I want nothing less than to see these Boy's brought to justice, it is what I live for. With this said I will end for the night. I hope to Hell the right People read this, sincerely, Kelly McGill.

156 Followers?

   I must be doing something right, I have more Followers then ever now. I made up My mind just to follow Police and the likes, it seems to be working. I don't have much to say except I'm looking for work. Would'nt You know Cheyenne seems to be a hotspot, after My last visit I'm a little gun shy. Four months in Jail for doing nothing. I'll never walk past a Jailhouse and say 'There's a Jail I've never been in.' again, seriously, I wound up there that night. It did'nt help that I was drunk and wanted to talk to the Police about Richard Pattison. What I really wanted was to go to the Mental Institute so I could prove I am not insane, crazy or what? Damn Drunks anyhow. I was a serious one too, in My early twenties I could drink a case of beer, and did everyday, and still maintain some sense. Now if I drink a twelve pack and I'll be a slobbering Fool. I am insisting on staying sober now. I did it for a year and a half before and I was sober for around five months after the superbowl last year. I wound up starting again after the class reunion this summer, one beer and I'm hooked again so this time I refuse even the one. I have confidence in My ability to stay dry. I will prevail. Drowning Your sorrows is not the answer Folks, words I am going to live by. Have a good one Folks, Kelly.

I quit!

   I quit, but not here. I hate it when You work with People that just don't give a damn if it looks good or not, so I walked off another job today. The main Boss said I could go back to work but it would lead to a fight on the job so screw it. I know it sounds like I can't get along but really can't stand a lot of People in America. So many of Them treat You like crap, and when You get pissed Your the bad Guy. All My life I have had some Jerk trying to piss Me off. I told You about My Sister Lois yelling at Me when I was a Kid. That went on from the time around when I was in the fifth grade until high school, no shit. She went as far as telling Her first Husband that I hit Her in the breast and made Her boob fall off. He was going to kick My ass for it until I convinced Him She was lying. It amazes Me how People can screw with You and think it's right. I keep reading where some Kid out there is bullied to the point of suicide, damn Kids, knock Your crap off. "You have a lot to live for.", is a saying that has kept Me going at times. I even tried to commit suicide once Myself, I tied My shirt around the bars on the cell door and hung there. Once I started choking I stood up. So I know first hand what it feels like to want to end Your life. I have come to the conclusion that there is nothing I can do about this Richard Pattison Fella. I have no proof that He set up the acid for Me, even thought I know for a fact that He and Bill Rowley did so. And They have the freedom to do whatever They want on the Television it seems too. All I can really hope for is that a semi runs Them down, justice anyway I can get it right? Arrogant Bastards like those win while the slow Folks like Me get rolled over on I understand that, for that is the way of the World. But just once a Loser like Me needs to win. Here's to that. Kelly.

Love Stinks!

   I got one for You here. I told You about Sheila and Nancy both having love in Their eyes, well I have seen it four times now. Once with Nancy and twice with Sheila there was another time to boot. This time is really amazing too. I have done a lot of hitch hiking in My life, and on one trip I was sitting along side of the road when a bus went by. This bus happened to be an old Folks bus. I looked up from where I was sitting and looked into the eyes of an elderly Woman, she had love in Her eyes. I am smiling right now thinking of that one. Some Gal's just have a soft spot for a Kid like Me I guess. The bad part is that I get so shocked by it that I revert into a small Child to tell the truth. One major malfuntion with Me is that I have a stubborn streak too, that is what has came between Me and Sheila. Nancy just blew My mind so bad I ran away and have cried about it ever since. Believe Me when I say, true love does exist, I know I feel it constantly. It hurts like Hell to break a Woman's heart I say with the voice of experience. All of this just proves how naive and innocent I was in My youth. I was the type People could take advantage of and They did just exactly that too. When I realize just how I was set up by My so-called Friends I boil with anger. I insist on saying that Richard Pattison and Bill Rowley are directly the cause I My misery when it comes to My mental problems. They will be damned lucky if They escape with Their lives My Friends, in My opinion what They have done to Me is a killing offence. I admit that I went to California to seek Richard out and do just that, I stopped Myself halfway to Washington to do the same to Bill Rowley. There is'nt a Man alive that would not want the same if He were in My shoes and You know that. I am a simple Child in life Folks and it made it a horrid existence on Earth I say it here and now. I sure as Hell hope the right People read this and I find My justice, but until I do I write. Have a great life Folks, and Kids? STAY THE FUCK OFF OF THE DRUGS GODDAMNITT!!! Really! Sincerely Kelly.

Post 300

   Still here, still trying. If I have'nt proved My honesty yet I don't know what else I can do. Yes I was sent a message of some sort via a Playboy after I walked into a party at the Marriott hotel in Austin Texas. Why else would Johnny Carson be talking about it. I admit I never read the article stating I had walked in to the party, nor did I actually hear Mr. Carson mention My name. It is odd how Johnny stared at the camera after saying "The Weirdo!" when the channel was changed back to His show. He immediately went to commercial and when He came back He started with all this "Mr. Floyd calling Mrs. Floyd." crap. Strange? Yea I'd say. But that is the way People seem to be, I'm talking about Them not Me. I never asked to be changed in any way shape or form Folks. I was happy go lucky as Laura Chiles called Me. Now I am a depressed Kid that is fighting for a chance to bring down a Punk that thinks He's cute. A Hotshot Kid is what Richard Pattison is and has always been. I take a look at this Hefner character and see Him that way too. What a life He lives. What is He 85? And married to a Girl in Her twenties I believe. Jealous? Not even. I would be the happiest Man on the face of the Earth just to be with Nancy or Sheila, straight up. I am dead serious too, these Bastards tried to get Me to huff Ether while They had Me so high I can tell you I saw My life spinning out of control, but I was no way wise enough to realize what was actually happening at the time. I just knew I had better not try any thing like Ether, I know I would be a useless Person as far as thinking goes. It's sad but true, these were My Friends. I surely do hope something comes of all this, I want to see these Bastards sitting in Jail for Their crimes. I will end with that said tonight. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Just another blog

   How's it going today? I'm still fightin' Myself. Expect a new boot on the market if We can accomplish Our objective. Today We sent in the paper work, along with $1,000. for a patent. I have My fingers crossed. Once I am finished here I plan on getting a hold of a company in Omaha Nebraska about funding Us. If all goes well I can say for sure I won't be wasting My time writing about My sorry life anymore. For years I have had the dream of opening My own C-stores. I would put Them where I am sure They would make a profit. Plus I am a Carpenter and know how to do custom work, I would love to build a few houses and sell Them. We'll see aye? Other than that I aint gonna say a damn thing about how rotten life has been. I'll C-Ya later, Kelly.

I refuse to quit!

   Yesterday I mentioned My memory, it's still intact it's only when I try to remember exact times of occurances that I get a little fuzzy. But I do know exactly when I was set up with the drugs that started My mind to wander. I feel it may take years to bring down these People, but it is definitely worth it if it works. The reason I am saying this is that here in My hometown of Riverton Wyoming a crime has just been proven. It took place around a month after I left for Austin Texas so I never even heard of it. A Woman and Her two Sons were killed by Her ex-husband in September of 1980. He was sentenced to life in prison without parole Friday. One of the Guys at work went to the hearing because He was a Friend of the Boys when it happened. Murder is worse than what took place in My life, even though I really wish They had of killed Me instead because I would not have suffered the mental trauma I have seen for the past thirty two years. It was a vicious thing to do to My life even though. I seek justice by writing about My screwy life, I sure as Hell hope it works. Have a great day Folks, Kelly McGill.

My life?

   I told You about going to Santa Monica, I went the second time to track down this Pattison Fella, the first time I went to try and get My life story written. I first started trying to get it wrote right after the attack in New York in 2001. I was so confident that it was going to be written I just dropped everything I owned and went to California. I left a storage unit in Dallas full of tools and drove My truck to Arizona where it broke down and took a bus into L.A. where I first went to Pasadena. After a week there My pants were falling off Me due to the lack of food. I looked for work everyday and in the evening I would go over to where an orange tree was and eat. Finally I went to Santa Monica where I knew Playboy west studios was located. I camped out just down the street. One of the things I left in Dallas was My attempt at writing My biograghy, I bet the Folks that wound up with that unit had a good laugh when They opened it and saw My I.D. I went and got one during lunch one day, They told Me to take My hat off. My picture was with My hair sticking straight up and a goofy smile on My face. Plus I had a shirt on that read Rotten Ralphs, a seriously funny look to tell the truth. My visit was for not, and I soon left California after around seven months in the streets. They really make it too easy out there for You, I knew where to get three meals a day during the week. And on Saturday You could really stock up for Sunday, there are a lot of fat Homeless People out there. I have seen it where a Drunk is passed out and People will lay money down next to Him so that when He awakens He can go get a beer. After I left I hitch hiked for nearly five thousand miles. First I went to St. Louis and stayed with My Nephew, after a week there and no work I went to Memphis. Three days there and I was off to Nashville. I have been told My songs are pretty good so I thought I'd try that route. A street musician plays His heart out and gets little in return. I made $1. in Nashville. I was playing and a Man and His wife were standing at the light waiting for it to change, at first They ignored Me, but after listening for a second He turned back and gave Me a buck. Everytime I found a place where I could make some real cash I was run off, it sucks being out there and busting You hump for change. To finish the trip I went back to Dallas and finally to Austin. I took on a job building pre-fabbed arches right next to Dell computers in Round Rock, all I had was a borrowed saw and cord. Where I learned to frame We used axes, I'm still faster then You would believe driving nails. John Lucas was My Boss for years in Austin, He has trophies the size of a Man for competition nail driving, I was always just a breath slower. He won first place one year with 36 nails in 30 seconds. It did'nt take Me long to be able to buy a truck and I was going strong again. I could still go to Texas and run a crew of My own but it's getting rough to do anymore, the Mexicans are taking it over. Enough rambling on for tonight, I just felt like talking about trying to get My story told, so I'll quit with this said. Good night and have a great weekend, Kelly.

Will I ever win?

   Here I go again. I am the first one to admit to being a Loser, not many would say it out loud. I lost Sheila twice, I broke Nancy's heart, I was shocked to the point of being pissed at a Gal Who is the owner of the most beautiful face You'll ever see, I really can't count without really looking hard at it how many heartbreaks I have suffered. I remember one I may not have mentioned though. I was in Deep Ellum Dallas when a Gal walks up and takes My beer away from Me and asks, "Are You always this dull?". I gave Her a cold look but She still drug Me out onto the dance floor. Once there She asked Me, "Can You dance Nasty?", well I had in the mood quick. So quick I believe Her Friends thought I had drugged Her, They escorted Her away saying She had a phone call. One of Them was giving Me a serious dirty look as They left. Hell I again was dumbfounded, I was an innocent Fool with the help of others. Life sucks aye? I write this tonight just so You can see what I live with in My life, has Anyone seen a more deserving Kid? I feel I deserve a break in life and that is exactly what I seek here. I may never achieve such a break but a Fellas gotta try right? That is just like one of My songs, 'Better try', My vocals suck on this one but it would rock Your socks off. You know I'm actually feeling pretty good tonight, which is another song of Mine 'Yesterday & Today' that is exactly what it's all about, feeling like crap one day and on top of the World the next. Speaking of heart breaks, these Gals in My past keep this Kid going forward, I never knew such Women could feel for a sorry ass Kid like Me and now that I realize this I look forward to meeting that certain Someone in My future, I just hope too Hell She does'nt shock Me too much. With that I will end. Prayers and good wishes to You all, Kelly.

Still Pissed Off!

   Yea I am as mad as a Person can be about all of this crap. I insist that I am the Victim here. Everyone of You have to admit that if it was You or one of Your Children You would want justice. Justice is exactly what I seek, not sympathy. I look at the World with an open mind but I do not accept the things that have taken place nor the crap going on today. Forgive My ranting, but They really tick a Fella off when They are allowed to do whatever They want. I understand that when They are looked at They have clean records, but so does Everybody in the World until They are convicted of Their first crime. These People are not the Angels They pretend to be Folks, I admit I am no Saint but I do not go out of way to screw with innocent People. I hope You totally understand that there will be no talking if and when I see these Boys again, I just hope to Hell I don't go to Prison for taking a life. This comes from a real Person and My name is Kelly McGill. Thank You for at least reading this, and bless the day these Boys are brought to justice. Kelly.

Veiwed 4601 times now

  How is Your evening going? Good I hope. I'm still kicking is about all I can say. You know, it bothers Me that I can say that I really want to shoot some Kid for messing My life up and then screw with Me the way He does, but I feel it is the only way to achieve the attention I need in order to bring this Richard Pattison Fella down. I tell no lies Folks, seriously. My life is a strange one even to Me. I break hearts due to Their shocking beauty, and that My Friends is a bother to My Life. If I had it to live over I can say for a fact My Life would be different than the one I know now for sure. If You have'nt noticed I don't write near as much as I did when this first started, I find it harder and harder to find something to say. I used to write down stuff so I would have new things to talk about but I can't find the time at work to do so now. I understand what a lot of Folks are more than likely saying about this, "That's just tough, They did'nt make Him do the drugs.", no but They did make sure an innocent slow Boy was set up with enough drugs to spin His life out. I hope to Hell this works and They get taken down. Sincerely, Kelly McGill.

Again I write

   What more can a Guy do short of shooting some Fool for messing with His life? I want these People so bad I have been doing this for over two years, for what? All I have accomplished is to prove I am a Fool and cause Myself excruiating pain in the process. I tell no lies when I say I am messed with and that these People started out by screwing My life up. I again say that I am not the mess They wanted, but I am a mess of a life. All I can say is that They would be wise to avoid Me at all costs. I may not be insane but I do have a knack for losing it on Assholes, and I would definitely start the fight. Kelly.

The McGill Clan!

  I just had to add this one tonight. I told You about having to watch the Family eat, Dad would have slipped Me some food if He was there. How about this one, "The Prison farm allows Rapist too run free and rape Women and the Town let's Them do so!", I confronted Mom and She denied saying it, I contacted the U.S. Marshals when drunk telling Them this, as I say I was drunk. I do believe My Folks wee contacted about the Playboy and told these Assholes to screw with Him. A truth serum? They all would deny! Kelly!

Kelly McGill Here!

  Hey! I am real! Yes My name is Kelly McGill and I am the Victim! It does'nt seem to matter though, these Fools are rich, They win. All I have going for Me is that I would demand a truth serum, Them? Hey I deserve a chance to win. In the first place I am not a Molester, a Rapist, a Murderer or anything that I Myself would hold down. These People are guilty of heinous crimes. Huh? I sit here and suffer? Proof? Again I demand a truth serum, in the least an attempt too prove My case! But no, I am the butt of Their jokes, reality! Madd? You had better believe it! I tell no tells when I say I went to Hollywood to Kill Richard Pattison. I at least grab My senses before I made it to Washington for I would have taken Bill Rowley's life My Friends. Again I say that I say this in order to achieve the attention of the Police, but the facts are that I would gladly have taken Their lives. I understand that I am putting Myself in jeopardy of being brought down but I can only tell the truth. Thus far I seem too be going nowhere, but still I try. "Richard Pattison, Killeen Texas!", Kelly! Kelly! Kelly! Ah I wanted the MaGilla Gorilla!", "Grandpa Kelly says Eeeah!", Hey? How much can a Guy take?  A normal Man would have hunted these People down, I tried, and killed Them. Give a Guy a break, Kelly.

Bullcorn!

  I really cannot believe that these People are allowed to mess with My life and get away with it. I understand that it takes time, if it is even being looked at, but come on.